There is something I've been seeing more and more often in my private psychological practice lately, which is not related to a specific event, but to a much deeper, neurological condition: people simply losing their sense of security. I mainly help people with endometriosis and fertility difficulties, and people who are afraid of driving, but these are often not the main focus of my consultations these days.
Somehow everyone is more anxious, irritable and unfocused, and stress can of course affect the symptoms of these conditions, but I'm going to talk about much more than that. What I see in my patients, and in my friends and acquaintances, whether they are at home or abroad, is that they are very emotionally affected by the election campaign period, much more than they have been.
It's not just that there's "a lot of news" or that "the campaign is louder", but that the information we're now encountering - intelligence, manipulation, hidden agendas, threatening narratives - is fundamentally unleashing a very basic belief that the world is somehow predictable and understandable, and simply pulling the rug out from under us.
I encounter situations like this:"The stakes are high. It will determine our lives in concrete terms. I can't go on living like this, if there is no change I will suffocate, we will have to move. But I wanted to raise my children here. This is our home... Where should we go?"
And things like "The child comes home from school crying. He saw on some poster that we were going to be attacked and there was going to be a war. What can I tell him, Nora, what words can I use to explain to a seven-year-old what is going on, what is deliberate fear-mongering, what is manipulation, and what is manipulation, and what is more, in such a way that I am getting on my nerves?„
These are the questions I encounter: If our own police, our own prosecutors, the best prepared agencies in our country do not protect us, who will? Who can I rely on, who can I rely on if there is trouble?"
And when it falters, the nervous system does not react gently, but goes into a state of alert, because it perceives the defencelessness, the hopelessness, as a threat. Increased readiness is an evolutionarily good and natural response to challenges, because it keeps our focus where it needs to be in order to survive, and it keeps our body in a state where we can respond most effectively to minimise damage: to run, to escape, or to pick up the gauntlet and fight.
What you need to know, however, is that this state of readiness requires an enormous amount of energy on the part of your serpent, so ideally it should last for a short time, obviously until you successfully escape or fight off the hungry lion. If the state of readiness persists for a long time, it is not a natural state and can completely deplete the body's reserves, causing both mental and physical problems. And the political skirmishes have been going on for months and will continue for weeks, and many say there is no end in sight, because whatever happens, it won't be easy. If a country that has been gutted to the hilt, where all economic power is in the hands of the previous government and its friends, is taken over by a new administration, it will have to build a castle out of shit, and that is a hardcore mission, and it will come at a price. If nothing changes, and the corrupt, oppressive, exploitative system remains, there is no need to go into why it is problematic.
I will not go any further in my analysis of the situation, because this article is intended for everyone, regardless of political affiliation, for each and every person who is affected by this period of uncertainty, to talk about ways to mitigate the psychological consequences and to give practical tips.
Anxiety, anger, overwork, sleep disturbance, irritability and often another very important feeling: helplessness. Whatever side you take, it often operates on guilt by building on your patriotism, saying, let's all be one man, let's convince our neighbours, friends and all the other bunnies.
It is very important to see something clearly here. It is not your job to convince others.
It's not your responsibility to "set people right" in comments, arguments, explanations, in the shop, on the tram, at work. Please let that be and remain the business of the parties. If you are not motivated in that direction, you should not force yourself into situations that only upset you. It is your responsibility to keep yourself stable, because if you yourself are not well, if you are left upset, exhausted, anxious after a conversation, then it is not really social responsibility, it is simply pushing yourself out, giving up on yourself. Perhaps most importantly, it's about a stable nervous system. The goal is not to follow everything, to have an opinion on everything, to participate in every debate, but to be able to hold your own, because in the long run it's not how many debates you win that counts, but how well you stay together in the process. And that is where the real responsibility begins.
There are a lot of fruitless, joyless arguments going on now, with no real purpose, no real outcome, just firing up the nervous system, and then you're left with tension that you can't put down. It's a perfectly legitimate decision to step out of it, an adult, mature boundary drawing. Use the parrot method, always say the same thing, never one word more, be so boring that the other person who would insist on "chatting" will find someone more exciting to talk to than you.
Repeat this: "As I said, I don't want to talk about that." The other important layer is the conscious rebuilding of a sense of security, because what many people are experiencing is not simply information overload, but a kind of "the system is not stable" experience.
And it makes a big difference where you put the focus. Is it "this could have happened, so anything could happen" or "this has come out, so there are still mechanisms in place, there are people who are standing up, who are speaking out" ? Same information, completely different neurological impact.
It is also important to validate what you feel. If you are angry, that is understandable; if you are sad, that is understandable. If you're upset by a documentary, a report, a story - for example, the feelings that linger after The Price of Voting - that's totally okay. I think it is important that as psychologists we do not talk about some abstract pedestal of expertise, but show that we are human beings, and that emptiness and freezing after learning such information is unfortunately a perfectly normal human reaction. I, too, stared at the now blacked-out screen for minutes afterwards, and all I could think of was 'oh my God, oh my God, oh my God'. The task is not to 'pull yourself together' as quickly as possible, but to turn to yourself with the same love and devotion you have for the characters in the film. Be there for yourself, accept that you are moved by what you have seen and ask yourself what it is that would make you feel even a hair better. I've put together some practical, simple exercises for you to do just that.
This is the part that you can actually do.
-Progressive muscle relaxation
Go through your body, muscle group by muscle group: tense with maximum force for 5-7 seconds, then release. Leg, thigh, abdominal, shoulder, arm, face, eyelid, jaw muscles. The contrast of tensing and releasing helps to "train" the body back to a relaxed state, because after maximum tension the muscles have to relax, they can't do anything else. And your nervous system gets the message: there was tension, so there was danger, but the tension is gone - so there is no danger. It's a symptomatic treatment, obviously you'll still be nervous, but because this exercise has no side effects, it's not like taking a Xanax, you can repeat it any number of times. Look on the bright side: after all that stretching, you'll have biceps like never before. (Yes, humour can help you cope.)
Long exhaled breath
Inhale for 4 seconds, exhale for 6-8 seconds, for at least 5 minutes. It's one of the easiest ways to get out of a state of alertness, and anyone who can breathe that slowly is a luxury, telling your nervous system that you're definitely not in danger.
Cold stimulus
Rinsing the face with cold water or a cold object on the neck - through the planetary nerve very quickly reduces the activation.
"5-4-3-2-1" grounding
Very slowly, look around the room you are in, name 5 things you see, 4 things you feel in your body, 3 sounds, sounds you hear, 2 smells and 1 taste. This brings you back to the present, when your mind is very scrambled, plus again, the infinite slowing down of your looking around movements is again a luxury, someone in danger, fleeing from a hungry lion, is fast and breathing gasping and not really caring what taste they have in their mouth, so again you're making your nervous system think everything is ok.
Physical movement
Walking, pilates, swimming, hiking, jogging, gym - whatever, just go and do what you love, try to be there in your head, admire the scenery, feel your body, your muscles working.
Container technique
Imagine a box or container in which you "put" the news, thoughts, fears in the form of symbols, and you consciously seal them and throw them into a ravine in your imagination - this helps you not to carry them all day
And at the everyday level:
- Set a specific time for news consumption and don't go back to scroll outside that time. If it's news, for example, fifteen minutes at noon, no more. Make a promise to yourself, and make the promise you make to yourself count.
- Do not read the news at least 2 hours before bedtime in the evening
- Once you know who you're voting for and your decision is certain, allow yourself to stop obsessively following events. If you're sure, what difference does it make who comes up with what?
- Choose who you talk to about this - not everyone is safe to talk to about these topics. It can help if you check in with yourself, observe how your body feels, he or she will speak up, tense, fidget, if something is wrong before you realise it in your mind. Listen to him.
- If a conversation "blows up", that's enough information to politely but firmly walk away.
- It's worth putting friendships on standby if you fear that your relationship is in for this persuasive, tense period. You are so much more than your political views. You don't have to make it completely part of your identity, you don't have to believe in the very Hungarian, very exaggerated, hate-mongering adage that anyone who is not with us is against us. Was he there with you when you had your heart broken? Did he visit you in the hospital? Are you the godmother of his children? Did he water your avocados while you were on vacation, could you count on him? Then don't let the stress of the election come between you. Hug him and say that because I care so much about our friendship and it hurts me to fight, how about we check in with each other at the end of April when we're over this.
And there is another important aspect that is surprisingly little talked about, because we tend to reduce stress reactions to the "fight or flight" axis, while our nervous system has a much richer toolbox.
Because there is a fourth way: interconnection.
There are people from whom distancing yourself will help, but there are people with whom connecting will help. Not trying to cope with all this alone, but consciously seeking out people who are good to be with, who don't make you more upset, but on the contrary, calm you down, recharge you, find your way back to yourself.
And yes, there is that type of person - and you may be one of them - who gets better not by withdrawing completely, but by taking action.For them, a conversation, a meeting, a shared programme, even an event or some kind of activity is a form of neuroregulation. The experience of control is not only returned by shutting out stimuli, but also by feeling that you are influencing something, that you are part of something beyond yourself. And, as with everything, there is a very concrete, biological basis for this.
When you're connected, when you're in a safe environment with others, when you're laughing, talking, being together, your nervous system senses safety, not danger, and this triggers neurochemical processes - such as oxytocin production - that reduce stress, strengthen attachment and specifically help you "come out" of a state of alert.
And perhaps that's why the image I often use is so powerful: zebras who can't run away from the hungry lion, but who don't choose to fight individually. I don't know if I've seen it in nature films, but when they have the opportunity to do so, because they are together, in a group, the zebras often don't run away and save their course individually, but they close ranks and take the weaker individual, the injured, the sick, the baby zebra, in the middle, stand in a circle facing each other and together, collectively, keep the predator at bay with powerful back kicks. They do not let it in between them, together they form a wall of their own bodies. They are not trying to survive separately, but together.
And perhaps that is one of the most important questions at this time: who you let close to you, who you cling to, and whether you allow spaces in your life where the experience is not one of fear, not one of tension, not one of division, but one of connection. It's not just what you shut out, but what you fill the space with. Sometimes the greatest stabilizing force is not more and more extra information, but simply the presence of another person.
If you need more help, you can contact us online you can book an appointment for a psychological consultation HERE. Sometimes just one conversation can take you in new directions.
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